Wow I am liking Teresa of Avila again …
I have this love / hate relationship with Teresa of Avila
(maybe it is sister wife rivalry) the mystical spouse thing and all …
I knew she entered the convent because she feared getting
married and then dying in child birth … I had always thought she used the
convent like birth control … like many men used the seminary for homosexuality
… just another soul who is sexually dysfunctional …
But then I read more about Teresa of Avila and read her mom
died in childbirth when Teresa was 13 (tuff time for a little girl to lose her
mom… while she was discovering her own sexuality or at least that is the age
“normal people are discovering their sexuality) … to have your mom die in child
birth would place a deep fear into you that childbirth is not a good thing and
you have to avoid it all costs …
I went on to read at
that age Teresa was pretty sassy … probably had a couple of “flings” with the
local gentleman … she was into the world and fashion … that is so cool!!! So the virginal status (mandated by the
church in order to be holy, was probably not present in Teresa) …
Which only
makes her Normal! And why doesn’t the Church stress this more, they try to make
their saints into “unicorns” … magical creatures who are above human emotions
and desires … all while many of them throughout the history of the Church have been sexual perverts.
late vocation and I was in the navy, and I had girlfriends
before I became a priest”…
Again I
pressed so do you miss being with a woman … Fr. Martin said this “I have known
women and I chose to become a priest and to remain celibate” …
Fr. Martin made me think about what it really means to be
“celibate” you cannot choose or opt to be celibate, if first you were not… to
choose something is based on knowing both sides of any given subject (in real
time) … so no man can choose celibacy without first knowing intimacy … if they
do not know both sides it is not a “choice” it is a running away from sexuality
it is by its nature a dysfunction …
So after reading more about St. Teresa of Avila and knowing Fr. Martin... I believe they were both very Holy people, who loved God on
very profound level and they “made choice” to be celibate, they did not run
away from sexuality and call it holy to do so … which is a perfect offering to
God... The other way to offer “celibacy” not so much … It is an incomplete personality
lacking in emotional intelligence and sexual maturity... or a twisted sense of
sexuality hence all the predators in the clergy ...
